or CHAPTER XI of Marti Soosaar’s e-book "A New Beginning"
Tell me who your friends are and what you eat, and I’ll tell you who you are
If we’re going to take that literally, right now I’m coffee with milk and Kalev dark chocolate with nuts. For better or worse, that was not a paid advertisement. Unfortunately, because I don’t get paid for it. Fortunately, because I can eat whatever I want while I write.
Of course, there is some truth to the idea that, to a certain extent, we are what we eat, even though we know that our bodies metabolize nutrients. So I may stuff myself with kilos of sweets, but in the end I still won’t be as sweet as chocolate—just your average potbellied fatso.
Even more than food itself, however, we are influenced by our circle of friends, because they actually affect what we eat. We are all subject to certain social norms, and those norms are shaped by our experiences and the company we keep.
In 2003, I went to work for the Estonian Sports Association Kalev in Tallinn. Although it is a sports organisation in name, my good colleague Raimo, with whom I usually went to lunch, had developed a habit of eating at Hesburger or McDonald’s, and he quickly got me into the same habit. Two stops by tram from Kosmos to Viru Square, followed by yet another large burger meal with large fries and a Coca-Cola—five times a week. During the two years I worked at Kalev, I discovered that I had gone from a muscular decathlete to an average flabby-bellied desk jockey. Raimo, of course, was unaffected by those countless burgers and probably still follows his daily fast-food diet. Unfortunately, I couldn’t get away with it—and I’m not the only one.
If your friends like to drink themselves senseless at Nimeta Bar every Friday and Saturday until they can’t even remember their own names, then shovel a wheelbarrowful of tacos into their mouths on Suur-Karja Street, you don’t stand much chance of becoming as fit and lean as Kregor Zirk if you keep spending time with that crowd. You may be better at staying afloat, though.
If that description bears even a passing resemblance to your life, you now have two options. Either stop spending time with those friends and find new ones, or persuade your friends to change their behaviour. The second option may prove difficult, and if you start preaching about healthy exercise and nutrition, you may be lumped in with Jehovah’s Witnesses. Of course, your friends may also have realised that their health is no longer as robust as it was at the turn of the millennium and that the time is ripe for a lifestyle change. In that case, give them a chance. Otherwise, replace the people you spend time with day to day with a more active crowd.
Where can you find people like that? The training groups mentioned in an earlier chapter are a good place to start meeting new friends who enjoy sport.
I always think that I want to be more athletic and in better shape than the average Estonian, for whom every other day is a rest day. As a coach, I want and need to set an example for those who find it harder than I do to make it to a workout. That’s why I don’t give myself much time to come up with excuses, and I find even just 30 minutes for some vigorous exercise. This way, I can get a workout done in any situation as long as I know there is no real reason to take a rest day.
Krete Junson
youth coach, personal trainer
But how can you encourage your existing friends to care more about their health? An excellent initiative for men is Pikema Sõpruse Päev. Look it up on Facebook.
Go for a health check-up with your friends to identify your health risks and get sound advice on how to improve your health. Then go hiking or go-karting, play paintball, or do something else fun together that you may not have done for a decade. Hopefully, a day like this will make your friends much more health-conscious. Ultimately, you will benefit too if the activities you enjoyed when you were younger return to your list of hobbies after gradually being displaced by sitting around in the pub over a beer.
If you are surrounded by people with good habits, things will be easier for you too. And there is another particularly simple and excellent way to bring more people with the right mindset into your life.
Share this e-book with your friends. Post the link on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn. If they read it and change their habits for the better as a result, positive changes will happen around you, and they will influence you too.
If you want to be stronger and healthier, change your friends’ habits or change your circle of friends.
This was Chapter Eleven of Marti Soosaar’s e-book “A New Beginning”. We have also published the previous chapters, which you can read on our blog, while the complete e-book can be downloaded HERE.
Invite a friend over or ask them to join you outside for a workout, and choose a workout HERE.
